December 25th or not...

The Word became flesh! oh what beautiful poetry that is. The Word, the one who created all, the love, the writer of history, He became flesh and blood. Became a vulnerable human being, to understand, to be tempted, to redeem His creation, to show us love like no other, to save us. Indeed we saw Glory, in his eyes, his hands, his feet, his life. The Word, the same one that has given me the breath of life, now has blood in his veins, a heart that beats like mine. The King left his throne in heaven to reign in my heart.

25 de Diciembre o no...

El Verbo se hizo carne! que poesía tan bella es esa. El Verbo, el que creó todo, el amor, el escritor de la historia, El se hizo carne y sangre. Se volvió un ser humano vulnerable, para entender, para ser tentado, para redimir a Su creación, para mostrarnos un amor como no hay otro, para salvarnos. En realidad vimos su Gloria, en sus ojos, sus manos, sus pies, su vida. El Verbo, el mismo que me dió aliento de vida, ahora tiene sangre en sus venas, un corazón que late como el mio. El Rey dejó su trono en el cielo para reinar en mi corazón.

Manifesto of a 32 year old

I hereby declare that all views expressed in this publication are facts from my life, all of them are true and should be taken seriously. It is a declaration of what I have learned in this year and believe to be true, the values and the commitments I have decided to live by.

Grace
To receive what you don't deserve. To extend to others what has been given to you. It leads you to tolerance, acceptance, forgiveness, redemption.

Compassion
To consider other people's needs more important than your own. To give of what you have and who you are to serve those who need you. To love.

Gratitude
One of life's greatest virtues. Awareness of everything and everyone you have, and thanking the ONE who has given you all this.

Freedom
Guilt has no place in one's heart. Whether you make a good or bad decision, you should feel free afterwards, even when you have to suffer the consequences. It is the way to happiness, it gives you a lighter heart.

Fullness
Everything I am , and everything and everyone I have today, is exactly what I need. I lack nothing, my expectations have been met, life is perfect just the way it is today.

Determination
Set ONE goal for your life, and never give up! No matter what comes your way, no matter what "they" say, give all of what you are to your endeavor, and when you get there, put a mark in the map where you're going next and start all over again.

Love
Some things just never change. GOD is LOVE, LOVE is GOD. The stars, the trees, the sea, the birds, a baby's hand, a beating heart, a breathing lung, a child's smile. He is there, He is here, HE is out there, He is in me. He loves me even when I don't deserve it, I love him even with a broken heart. And in the end it's all about love.

One more year, or a year less like some say, it really doesn't matter. What matters is that I am a 32 year old woman today that is as happy as she has ever been, that has found peace and comfort. A woman that had decided to live life at it's fullest, because that is the only way to do this!

Declaro que todas las opiniones expresadas en esta publicación son hechos de mi vida, todos son reales y deben tomarse como algo serio. Es una declaración de lo que he aprendido en este año y creo que es verdadero, valores y compromisos por los cuales he decidido vivir.

Gracia
Recibir lo que no te merecés. Extender a otros lo que se te ha dado. Te lleva a la tolerancia, aceptación, perdón, redención.


Compasión
Considerar las necesidades de otros más importantes que las tuyas. Dar de lo que tenés y lo que sos para servir a los que te rodean. Amar.

Gratitud
Una de las virtudes más grandes de la vida. Darte cuenta de todo y de todos lo que tenés, y darle gracias a AQUEL que te ha dado todo esto.


Libertad
La culpa no tiene cabida en el corazón de una persona. Ya sea que tomés una buena o mala decisión, deberías sentirte libre después, aún cuando sufrás las consecuencias. Es el camino a la felicidad, te da un corazón más liviano.

Plenitud

Todo lo que soy, y todo y todos lo que tengo hoy, es exactamente lo que necesito. No me falta nada, mis expectativas han sido cumplido, la vida es perfecta tal y como es.

Determinación

Ponete UNA meta en la vida, y no te rindás! No importa lo que venga, no importa lo que te digan, entrega todo lo que sos a tu tarea, y cuando lo alcancés, poné la marca en el mapa donde es la siguiente parada.

Amor
Algunas cosas nunca cambian. DIOS es AMOR, el AMOR es DIOS. Las estrellas, los árboles, la mar, los pájaros, la mano de un bebé, un corazón latiente, un pulmón que respira, la sonrisa de un niño. Él está ahí, Él está aquí, está allá afuera, está dentro de mi. Me ama aún cuando no lo merezco, lo amo aún con un corazón roto. Y al final, todo se trata de amor.


Un año más o un año menos como dicen algunos, en realidad no importa. Lo que importa es que soy una mujer de 32 años que es feliz más que nunca antes, que ha encontrado paz y consuelo. Una mujer que ha decidido vivir la vida a su plenitud, porque es la única manera de vivirla!

Don't rock the boat baby

Tonight's my last night in this beautiful paradise. Bittersweet it feels to go back to the "comfort" of my bed and the stress of the city. I am always suprised how easy and good life feels when I'm away from all that, maybe I just like to escape, I'm good at it. I have been confronted with the way I think life should be for those who have less, and maybe, just maybe, the have more than I will ever have. My good intentions and "hard work" don't mean a thing unless I know how to respect and listen to those around me. I believe I can bring change, but now I'm realizing I'm a bit clueless on how to to go about it. Much to ponder, much to wonder, much to meditate and much to understand. I say goodbye to La Moskitia after having the craziest boat ride of my life, through some of the most beautiful mangroves, rivers and lakes I have ever seen and I still can't believe I was given a chance to live my dream!

¡Hoy es mi última noche en este bellos paraíso! Sentimientos encontrados al regresar a la "comodidad" de mi cama y al stress de la ciudad. Siempre me sorprendo cuan fácil y buena es la vida cuando estoy lejos de todo eso, quizá me gusta escapar, soy buena para ello. He sido confrontada con la manera comp creo que la vida debería ser para aquellos que tienen menos, y talvez, sólo talvez, ellos tienen más de lo que yo jamás podré tener. Mis buenas intenciones y "trabajo duro" no significan nada a menos que sepa respetar y escuchar a los que me rodean. Creo que puedo ser agente de cambio, pero ahora me doy cuenta que no tengo ni la más mínima idea de como hacerlo. Mucho en que pensar, mucho en que meditar, mucho por entender. Le digo adiós a La Moskitia después de tener el viaje en bote más loco de mi vida, a través de los manglares, ríos y lagunas más bellos que he visto en mi vida y, ¡aún no puedo creer que se me fue dada la oportunidad de vivir mi sueño!

Bambi please don't break my hand

Being so close to perfection is overwhelming. Having perfection lick your hand is almost a miracle. Today I met and incredibly handsome White tail deer, he was small, maybe a teenager, I don't know much, but I know he came to me as if he knew me and wanted for me to give him some "sugar"! I never thought deer came that close to humans, maybe he just knew how cool I am :), but to be able to touch him and feel his fur was one of the most amazing feelings I've ever had! He was a bit rough, he wanted to be pet so badly that he kept pushing and bending my hand with his little antlers and I was afraid he would hurt me! But instead, he licked my hand and allowed me to see how beautiful and perfect he was! Having perfection so close to you, makes you think of LOVE, not the selfish kind of love that humans give, but that ONE that comes from the Creator, the love of the ONE that breath perfection into life.

Estar tan cerca de la perfección es abrumador. Que la perfección lama tu mano es casi un milagro. ¡Un conocí un venado cola blanca guapísimo! Era pequeño, quizá un adolescente, no se mucho, pero se que se me acercó como si me conociera y quería que le diera cariño. No pensaba que los venados se acercaban tanto a los humanos, talvez el sabía lo magnífica que soy ;), pero poder tocarlony sentir su piel es una de las sensaciones más increíbles que he tenido!
Fué un poco pesado, quería tanto que lo acariciara que empujaba mi mano y la doblaba con sus cuernitos, tenía miedo que me golpeará. Pero en vez de eso, lamió mi mano y me dejo ver cuan hermoso y perfecto él es! Tener a la perfección tan cerca, te hace pensarnen el AMOR, pero no el amor egoísta que dan los humanos, sino ESE que viene del Creador, el amor de AQUEL que dió aliento de vida a la perfección.

A poet and a beer

My friend Jorge and I set out on a journey to find entertainment in Ahuás. I was promised "tambako", a local dance party, and it didn't happen that night. We followed directions to where to find a cold beverage and found out it was closed. When we were feeling defeated, Milkeas came to our rescue! He said he would find us a beer and bring us safely back to our hotel! During our 20 mins together, Milkeas proved to be quite a character, he said he was the only biologist from La Moskitia and had studied like 5 different careers. He said we seemed intelligent people and he quoted Aristotle, Plato and José Martí. But the best part of our walk, was when he passionately said the words to a poem about the moon of the Lake Caratasca (that I'm sure he made up). Milkeas earned a couple of beers for being our guide, I gained a night full of memories!

Mi amigo Jorge y yo, salimos en un viaje a buscar entretenimienton en Ahuás. Me habían prometido "tambako", el baile tradicional, pero no se dió. Seguimos direcciones para encontrar un lugar donde comprar una bebida fria y lo encontramos cerrado. Cuando nos sentiamos casi derrotados, ¡apareció Milkeas al rescate! Dijo que nos encontraría cervezas nos traería de vuelta al hotel sanos y salvos. Durante nuestros 20 minutos juntos, Milkeas mostro ser todo un personaje, el único biólogo miskito, dijo, y ha estudiado como 5'diferentes carreras. Dijo que le pareciamos personas inteligentes y mencionó frases de Aristóteles, Platòn y José Martí. Pero la mejor parte de la caminata fue cuando apasionadamente declamó las palabras de un poema sobre la Luna sobre la Laguna de Caratasca ( que estoy segura que él inventó). Milkeas se ganó un par de cervezas por ser nuestro guía, yo, ¡gané una noche llena de recuerdos!

Bringing home the cat!

The coolest two minutes of probably my entire life! We took a small airplane from a community 10 mins away from Ahuás. George, the pilot, a super nice man, decided I was kind of a cool girl. While we were up in the air, he said :"here you go, is your turn!". I was like NO WAY! I took the controls and flew the plane for like two minutes!!! I didn't know how to control it of course, so I moved the handle to fast and the plane dipped! Everyone screamed! I was cheering! It's the little things in life, that make this whole journey awesome! Enjoy your two minutes of whatever it is life is letting you fly!

Los dos minutos más increíbles quiza de toda mi vida. Tomamos una avioneta pequeña a una comunidad como a 10 minutos de Ahuás. George, el piloto, un hombre muy agradable, creo que le caigo bien. Mientras volabamos me dijo: " ¡aquí está es tu turno!" Yo dije ¡NO PUEDE SER! ¡Tomé los controles y volé el avión como por dos minutos! No sabía como controlarlo por supuesto, y moví la palanca muy bruscamente y la avioneta descendió rápido. La gente gritó, yo celebré! Son las pequeñas cosas en la vida que se hacen que este viaje sea maravilloso. ¡Disfrutá los dos minutos de lo que sea que la vida te está dejando volar!

Fabiola

I met her this morning at the local clinic in Ahuas. She was with her sister Rosa and when I asked if she went to school she shily smiled and shook her head. I said - you don't like school?, - I do, she answered, - so why aren't you there?. She looked at her sister and giggled a bit. I bet she wonders why too. And that is the story of women and girls here. You visit the homes and there are no men, not even a lot of boys, women are feeding babies, cleaning , cooling, and the men? Somewhere else! maybe working, who knows, the truth is nobody cares much. I am not a feminist, but I believe women have the power to change the world, because we are strong, brave and wise. Fabiola deserves more than selling bananas, she deserves an opportunity.

La conocí esta mañana en el centro de salud de Ahuás. Estaba con su hermana Rosa y cuando le pregunte si iba a la escuela, sonrió timidamente y negó con su cabeza. ¿No te gusta la escuela?- le dije- Si me gusta- respondió,- entonces,¿por qué no vas?, miró a su hermana y se rieron por un momento. Seguro que rlla también se hace la misma pregunta. Y esta es la historia de las mujeres y las niñas aqui. Visitás las casas y no hay hombres, ni muchos niños, la mujeres dándole de comer a sus hijos, limpiandp, cocinando. ¿Y los hombres? ¡En algún otro lugar! Quizá trabajando, quién sabe, la verdad es que a nadie le importa. No soy feminista, pero creo que las mujeres tenemos el poder de cambiar el mundo, porque somos fuertes, valientes, sabias. Fabiola merece más que vender bananas, merece una oportunidad.

Simplicity

We complicate life with all the things we want we do not need, loving people that do no want to love us back, thinking of times we could've done things different and we didn't, worrying about tomorrow and trying to control what is to come. When you live in a place where all you got is what you have in your hands, all the other drama doesn't seem to matter. As long as you're healthy and can provide food and security for your loved ones, then life is all good. Simple, no complications, a life where you can take time to eat a mango underneath the shade of a beautiful tree.

Complicamos la vida con todas las cosas que queremos que no necesitamos, amando a aquellos que no nos corresponden, pensando en las veces en que hubieramos hecho las cosas diferentes pero no lo hicimos, preocupándonos por el mañana y tratando de controlar lo que está por venir. Cuando vivís en un lugar donde todo lo que tenés es lo que hay en tus manos, todo el otro drama no importa. Siempre y cuando tengás salud y podás proveer comida y seguridad a tus seres queridos, entonces la vida es buena. Simple, sin complicaciones, una vida en la que podés tomarte el tiempo para comerte un mango bajo la sombra de un hermoso arbol.

Yan nini Damni

There's not much out here. Field after field, and an occasional cow roaming through them. But there's people. People that welcome you into their homes without asking too many questions. This is indeed a whole different world. Nothing can make you feel more like an outsider than needing an interpreter in your own country , so I just gotta try. And when that mother welcomes me into her house I say "Naxa", "Hello" , and I tell them " yan nini Damni", my name is Dulce, and they smile. After that I'm in for real, and I am richer and fuller because they have given me a bit of themselves, and that's all I can take away from this incredible place.

No hay mucho aquí. Llanura tras llanura y la ocasional vaca rumiando en ellas. Pero si hay personas. Personas que te dejan entrar en sus casas sin hacer muchas preguntas. En realidad este es otro mundo. Nada te puede hacer sentir mas como un extraño que necesitar un interprete en tu propio país, así que solo me queda intentarlo. Y cuando esa madre me permite entrar en su hogar yo saludo "naxa", hola, y le digo "yan nini Damni", mi nombre es Dulce, y ella sonríe. Después de eso realmente estoy adentro y soy más rica y estoy mas llena porque me han dado un pedazo de ellos mismos, y eso es todo lo que puedo llevarme de este maravilloso lugar.

In the middle of nowhere in the middle of the desert in the midle of the mountains in the middle of the ocean...

I have decided to share my time in La Mosquitia by posting a journal entry with the highlight of my day during this week.

Day 1
Being here is a dream come true. To fly over this lost Paradise and delight in the beauty of creation, is absolutely priceless. People are so diverse, different languages, culture, skin color, smiles. They say I am from the "interior", I always thought they were. In here, life, has another flavor, one that I have never tasted before and I can't wait to try.

He decidido compartir mi tiempo en La Mosquitia posteando una nota con el highlight de cada uno de los dias durante esta semana.

En el medio de la nada, en medio del desierto, en medio de la montaña, en medio del mar...
Día 1
Estar aquí es un sueño hecho realidad. Volar sobre este paraíso perdido y deleitarme en la belleza de la creación, no tiene precio. La gente es tan diversa, diferente cultura, diferentes idiomas, color de piel y las sonrisas. Dicen que soy "del interior", siempre pensé que ellos eran. Aquí la vida tiene otro sabor, uno que no conozco y el cual me muero por probar.

Day 2

“Dear Body:

First, I want to apologize for doing this to you, but come one, you should be a little stronger, don’t you think?  It was just 1.5 mile non stop, that’s NOTHING! And here you are, feeling  defeated, longing for drugs that will end, or at least ease, your pain. You will get them soon, that’s a promise, but before I give them to you, I want you experience how it feels when you set out to do something that seems unattainable, something that you’re not good at, something that you’ve never tried. I want you to remember how it hurts now, so that tomorrow your muscles get stronger, and the next day you will draw from that pain to continue, to get to the finish line.”

Time flies when you’re having fun, but not when you’re running, it seems like those 45 minutes will never end. But somehow there is this twisted satisfaction when you’re done, “ HA now you’re in pain muscles!!” and you feel happy, successful!

I wish pain was always so real and tangible, you tend to remember that one day you fell off your bike and ended up in a ditch with a broken leg, or the time you fell off the stairs and got bruises all over your body, how about the time you tore your ACL and you had to have surgery, and you definitely remember the pain that comes from Malaria. So, how come when it comes to matters of the heart, relationships (not only romantic), choices in life, you forget the pain you felt that one day when someone broke your heart, or when you lied to your best friend?, you forget when others used and abused you, and you don’t seem to remember how you hurt yourself not being able to forgive. I wish my soul had VISIBLE scars, like the one on my knee, this scar reminds me to be careful when I play soccer because I’m gonna mess it up again. I want a scar that I can feel to remind me of the pain I’ve put myself through for being stupid, selfish and naïve, by letting others control my emotions and my happiness.

Because I am such a bad runner, when I run, I think of all the things that I’m not good at, I think of my flaws and my weaknesses. I think about ALL those things I can’t control that I know I should be able to. As I run and COMMAND my body to resist, to finish that 1.5 mile, it makes me believe I can COMMAND my soul to be better, didn’t they say I “have been given a Spirit of Power, Love and Self-Discipline”? I guess then, that I have no excuse! The only thing that can stop me from running this marathon is myself; the only one who can stop the change in my heart, is I.

Diary of a Nonrunner that signed up for a marathon

 This is not meI’m writing about, it’s about this girl that decided to grab her shoes and turnthem into running shoes, apparently, for no good reason.  In another place, that is not the one Ilive in, this girl woke up one morning and said to herself, “I think it’s timeto make a life changing thing, today, I will run”.

She was dreading it all day, because she hates running. Shehates that everything, yes, everything bounces when she runs, the feeling ofnot being able to breathe and that pain in her side after a sprint. She hatesthat her hair gets sweaty and her feet start throbbing, she hates the fact thatafter running for 15 minutes, she can barely go down a set of stairs, let alonewear heels the next day. Nonetheless, off she went!

As she stepped onto the track, the voices in her headstarted singing, “ How much pain has cracked your soul?” “Every step that I take is another mistake…”, “Itdoesn’t even matter how hard you try” “So keep pace, how slow can yougo”. “Thanks Muse and Linkin Park, that is EXACTLY, the motivation I needed formy first run”, she mumbled, she turned the volume up and let, the anger,the frustration and even the annoyance of the lack of self-trust, take over,and she ran.

I wish I could tell you that with every step she took sherealized she was born to do this forever, to run around the world and see thesunset from every cardinal point (yes, Forrest Gump reference), unfortunately,with every jog her fears were confirmed. Yes, the wind in her face feltamazing, there is a certain freedom when you run, but when her mindcame back to reality, she felt the pain in her left knee( she has a bad kneewhich she is always whining about), her neck felt tense and with it herstrength wanted to fade.

“The good Lord gave you a body that can stand most anything. It's your mind youhave to convince.” Her new motto, and for this reason, she didn’t stop. Everytime the pain would hit one of her bones, she went back to it, and keptrunning. She also thought her soul has gone through a lot of things she hated,that hurt, and she HAD to go through them, but in the end, she came outstronger, braver, wiser, so maybe if she could just endure and complete thisrun on the first day, it was just the start of a great race, where hopefullyshe will find her inner survivor, the fighter she knows lives inside. She kept running, with all her heartand her soul, even though she felt stupid and weak, she kept running, and she'll keep running, toignite a fire, from the inside out, that she’s afraid she has lost.